The Perfect 10

By Drew Allen

Recently, I was asked to describe the “perfect woman” and I realized that that was a trick question.  I know a lot of books and magazines out there try to tell you ladies what men look for in a woman, but the honest truth is, men categorize women, and different types of women are perfect for different types of things.

The perfect woman depends on the situation, the goal and, more than anything else, the stage in life a man finds himself in. So instead of offering some prototype that isn’t really real, I thought it might be more helpful to invite you ladies deep inside the inner-workings of the male mind.  Let’s spend the next few moments translating some common descriptions in man-speak, together; and while I break these terms down, you can take an honest assessment of which type or combination of types you think you may be:


Photo Credit: Erin Leigh McConnell

“She’s Cool

This woman may not be the best “looker” and probably has few qualities that we are truly interested in, but she probably has some attributes that make us take notice. Granted, it’s unlikely we’ll want anything serious with this woman; however, if the opportunity is presented, we’ll definitely take her up on the offer to have sex. Depending upon how good the sex is, we may just come back for seconds. Beyond that, we’re just not that into you.

If you are the recipient of frequent booty calls and nothing more, you probably fall into this category.


“She’s Hot

This is a reference totally based upon physical attraction: 100% eye candy right here! This woman definitely stacks up in all the right places! This woman can’t be denied by men OR women for that matter. She’s often perceived as “high maintenance” –  a girly-girl who keeps herself up at all times. She has a great sexy sense of fashion and style but may not be the brightest crayon in the box when it comes to intellect. We’d like nothing more than to brag to buddies about having her in the sack!

This is also what is known as the trophy category.


“She’s Cute”

“Cute” is a term that is mainly used in reference to this particular woman’s overall appearance and personality. Although this woman has many good qualities, she is easily overlooked during moments when our focus may be elsewhere. This woman could potentially grow on us over time, but there’s some underlying story here that we oftentimes don’t share.  Perhaps this woman is off-limits because she’s related to someone we know or has even dated one of our friends. In that case sleeping with her may equal crossing “the line.” In cases like that, this woman will be subtly rejected to avoid any detection of our secret attraction to her. “She’s cute…” is often a statement followed by “…but…”

Many platonic friends fall into this category.

“She’s Pretty”

We use the term “pretty,” mostly, to describe a particular woman’s physical appearance – specifically, her face. But there is more to this woman than just what is on the surface. “Pretty” women make for good conversation and have a sense of humor we can appreciate. This woman is “good company” and typically poses a real threat to any girlfriend or spouse. A “pretty” woman is a fun and  flirtatious woman. We definitely wouldn’t mind sleeping with this woman, but we’d rather make her our girlfriend. We might even start to question why our own girlfriends aren’t more like her.

This woman sometimes ends up in the “friend” zone due to some missed opportunity to take things to the next level.  


“She’s Very Pretty”

In addition to both physical attractiveness and intellect, this woman has earned our respect!  This is a woman who takes us beneath the surface and makes us want to understand and even connect with her. Men see this particular woman as outgoing and independent. Other women are often jealous of her because men tend to hold her in high regard. We’ll think twice before introducing this woman to just any of our friends, and we may even think this woman could make the perfect girlfriend or perhaps even a wife!

If we’re not currently dating this woman or trying to date her, you can bet that she falls into the “She’s the one that got away” category.   


“She’s Sexy 

Refers typically to her physical attractiveness…at least at first (keep that in mind)!!! But there’s more to this woman than meets the eye. On the surface, we find this woman exotic with a great fashion sense and style! She’s moves with a certain swag (or level of confidence for those that don’t know this term) . She commands attention when she enters a room. But, surprisingly,  she’s quite humble. She’s actually more comfortable wearing sweat pants or leggings and ball caps while just hanging out being “one of the guys”. We slowly begin to recognize her intellect because she’s not afraid to speak her mind or challenge us.

At first, this woman seems like she’s definitely a keeper. However, we often find out – down the road – that this woman has some major, hidden insecurities.


“She’s Beautiful

“Beautiful” is the term used to refer to the overall inner and outer attractiveness of a woman. This woman tends to range from one that’s extremely pretty – possessing the typical standards of beauty such as the clarity of her skin and the radiance of her smile – to one with imperfections in her skin and even sorrow in her eyes! But what takes precedence over her outer appearance is what’s inside her heart. This woman seems to encompass everything that we’d want in a wife and in the mother of our children. She is warm and nurturing, and well-liked by our family and friends. She can be humble yet fearless, quiet yet strong, even broken yet forgiving.  The funny thing is, she is often that “Cute” woman that we simply overlooked –  or weren’t ready for before – because we were too busy chasing what’s “Hot!”

This, for the most part, is the wife and long-term girlfriend category.


So there you have it.  If a man wants a good friend, then a “Cute woman” is right on time.  Have a class reunion coming up?  Then he’ll want to glide through his old stomping grounds with someone “Hot” on his arm.  But when he’s ready to make that commitment and settle down, then nothing short of “Beautiful” will suffice.

Control freaks of the world will probably not appreciate my perspective, but trying to be “perfect” is as crazy as trying to climb a mountain in a pair of high heels–so why even bother?  No matter what type of woman you are, you should know that you’re a great fit for somebody.  So, take comfort in knowing there is no such thing as a perfect woman.  It all boils down to perfect timing.
About the Author: Drew Allen is a former talk show host and writer originally from the Midwest. He currently lives in southern California.

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